Iris Myandowski loves working for a mentally ill boss

Dear Adoring Fans,

Times being what they are a month ago I accepted a job at the local Arby’s. I know this is not the most glamorous step given my entertainment history. But artists like me need to pay the bills and get by in between gigs.

One of the best perks for working for Arby’s (aside from the many free BBQ Bacon Cheddar Roastburgers and loaded potato bites I eat) is working for Roger, my mentally ill boss. It hasn’t been confirmed that he is actually insane. However, he seems to spend most of the day behind his manager’s desk mumbling incoherently to himself, attempting to fix the dysfunctional drive through speaker system or walking around and around the restaurant in a stupor. There is the odd occasion when he sets upon a hapless employee shouting at them to sell larger orders of curly fries.

I wonder if someday he'll run for office, as the above description seems suitable to many of our political leaders. As Dwight D. Eisenhower said, "Any man who wants to be president is either an egomaniac or crazy."

But most of the time he leaves us blissfully alone. I have lots of time to slip into the back storage room to practice walking on my hands over boxes of soda syrup.

Yours and forever,
Iris Myandowski (The hand walking queer)